Preheat oven to 350°F.
To make the mushroom bacon, add the soy sauce/tamari, maple syrup, liquid smoke, smoked paprika, and vegetable oil into a mixing bowl and whisk to combine. Add the sliced mushrooms and toss with your hands to coat them well. Set them aside to marinate for at least 15 minutes.
Line a large baking sheet with parchment paper. Add the mushrooms in one layer leaving some room for the grape tomatoes. Use reserved marinade for brushing during baking. Add the cherry tomatoes to the baking sheet and use some foil to separate them from the mushrooms. Bake for 12 to 15 minutes, then flip the tomatoes and mushrooms. Brush more marinade on the mushroom slices, and bake for another 12 to 15 minutes. You might need to remove the cherry tomatoes before the mushrooms are done baking.
To cook the quinoa, add quinoa, water, bay leaf, and a pinch of sea salt to a medium saucepan and heat over medium. Once it begins to simmer, turn the heat down to low and cover with a lid, cooking for about 12 to 15 minutes. Once cooked, remove the lid and fluff with a fork to let residual steam escape and set aside.
To make the vegan ranch dressing you can whisk everything together in a mixing bowl or jar until well combined. If you blend it together, just be sure to fold in the fresh herbs after blending so it doesn't turn green. Refrigerate the dressing until ready to serve the grain bowls.
Begin assembling the bowl with about a cup of cooked quinoa per serving. Add lettuce, avocado, portobello bacon, and blistered tomatoes. Drizzle the ranch dressing generously on top. Then place 2 vegan soft boiled eggs on top per serving, and garnish with fresh ground black pepper.